Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Attractive girls and "normal" guys

I was actually going to cover this topic this week, but blogger Ms. Mandy beat me to the punch in a short read titled quick comment.


Part of what she says:

Attractive girls are more willing to take someone on personality because they, one, can be more selective, and two, know what looks count for. I am not the most beautiful girl in the room. However I am striking, noticeably striking. I am not a Claudia Schieffer. I'm not bombshell good looking, but I have always gotten a lot of attention from males. And after a while it becomes tiresome and redundant. You hear the same corny pick up lines, you here the same compliments, and it ceases to matter. And you begin to realize it ain't a bed of roses. And all the attention that I get is not good attention.


That's exactly right.  I left a long, drawn out comment over on her blog, so go read it.  To continue on my comment and include some reference to her post, I don't use pick up lines.  I almost never compliment a woman.  The only time I'll raise a compliment in her favor is if she compliments me first.  This isn't a mind game, it's common sense.

I see two gals in a bar: a beautiful one and an average one.  The average one will likely shoot me down, the beautiful one will likely talk to me based on just one simple introductory phrase: "Hi, what's your name?"  That's it.  Not "Hey, beautiful, I'm ChicagoSane."  If she gives me her name, bonus.  I'll talk.  If she then asks for my name, double bonus: she's showing some interest.

What is the point of telling someone something they already know (in the form of a compliment)?  I'd rather be the one who gets to know a gorgeous, sexy woman (or an average one!) who never says "Wow, you're hot" but maybe a few weeks into it says "I'm amazed at how well you know Sartre."  And I won't even say that until I get a few "You have a great ass!" or "Your smile is amazing" from her.

I don't feed women shit.  I don't feed them lines.  I don't tell corny jokes.  I don't play the field at a bar looking for "the best." If I see someone cute, I'll say hi.  If she shoots me down, who cares?  Of all the women who have shot me down in 20 years of dating (HUNDREDS of women), I've run into maybe 5 more than once.

Thanks to Ms. Mandy for covering a really important topic.

15 comments:

"Celine" said...

I thought you were sexy and hot the moment I was introduced to you, crazy man. I do agree that us "beautiful" women aren't as crazy about looks.

ChicagoSane said...

Oh shush with that. You don't count because you heard of me prior, probably because "Paulo" mentioned me and my crazy adventures and attitude.

Plus, I remember your frown when we were introduced; I think you were surprised that I wasn't taller, stronger and better looking than him. Now he's one hot tapa, so how do you explain that? ;)

Andy said...

Good lord. our comment was longer than her post!

And I'm glad SOME men get this. I've always been approached by men who think saying vulgarities (they can't be called compliments, honestly) is cool. Guess what? NOT! I'm really glad when I can find a smart, gentlemanly man from time to time who actually appreciates me not only for the ass and the boobs.

And I loved the Sartre reference. I AM amazed on how well you know Sartre!! ;) Still waiting for the analysis!

ChicagoSane said...

*grin* Yes, I do like to interweave a little teasing poke into some of my writings. Inside jokes between blogger friends can be the most fun part of writing and commenting.

"Ah! yes, I know: those who see me rarely trust my word: I must look too intelligent to keep it."

I have that analysis (actually, two analyses) at my other home which I won't visit for a month or so, but I promise to send it out when I'm there. Too lazy to find it in my email history.

"Celine" said...

You must be forgetful. In your story about us, you forgot to mention what I said when, uhhh, you started the good business.

ChicagoSane said...

I am forgetful, which is why I am writing my journal publicly here instead of privately.

I am thinking back and I don't remember what you said :( I try to include the important stuff, and if you think it's important let me know and I'll surely edit it!

"Celine" said...

Ok ok. I know I'm anonymous here but I'm a lady, so I am torn on repeating it. My words exactly were 'When I first saw you, the only thing I thought was that I wanted you inside of me.' This was moments before you fulfilled that. ***blush***

ChicagoSane said...

Ohhh, I do remember that.

Ok, I have to leave and, mmm, do something. First a pretty Spaniard brunette teasing about wearing red glasses, and now this?

Do you NOT UNDERSTAND that I am not getting any right now?

Fuckers. I'm taking this blog private ;)

Andy said...

Yeah, I laughed a lot at that. I love inside jokes. Now I'll just have to throw somewhere a hint about our common music tastes ;)

Amanda S. Cowen said...

Ok! Now I have to make a comment now don't I? Considering it was part of my blog.

This is my words of wisdom:

You know Simone de Beauvoir was rumored to have written many of Jean Paul Satre's works?

And these comments are are inside jokes that I don't really get. However, I really think you need to get laid.

I will post something much longer tomorrow.

"Celine" said...

He does need to get laid. From what I can tell, there are at least gorgeous gals here that have been there and are willing to do it again (myself included). So what gives Mr. Sane?

ChicagoSane said...

Haha, my little world of teases.

You gals are great, all must get together sometime and drink to my health. I'm off to bed now, too tired to think straight and don't want Mr. Maker's Mark to do the talking.

You're right, Ms. Mandy, time for me to get laid. But I'm not in a rush, and I could care less if it takes awhile. I'm having a really awesome time rediscovering Chicago yet again.

Looking forward to your later comments.

Amanda S. Cowen said...

You can comment on my blogs all you want baby. I like what you post.

And I am only 5'3. It has never stopped me. It didn't even stop me from modeling.

I find a lot of men that like short girls.

And you should take up your friend on the getting laid part. Or masturbate...whatevs ;)

My Other Blog said...

Hmmmmm.....I wrote a post last night about an attractive guy (way out of my league) or someone pretending to be an attractive guy being interested or pretending to be interested in me. Right now I don't even know if he's for real, or if he's just sending me pictures from GQ! I'm not used to dating good looking men!

ChicagoSane said...

Ms.M: I think MOST guys prefer much shorter women. The same is true that I believe MOST women prefer taller men. Hence, I'd prefer to play the odds with a contrarian play: 1/5th of guys are over 6' tall, so women vastly outnumber tall guys.

I do prefer a short woman when it comes to long term relationships, but that's mostly for fashion's sake.


Ms. B: When it's is online or even offline, a person with better characteristics can always be frightening until you're used to it. Be wise, don't spend any money or give them any major assistance until they've proven themselves.

When I dated my first GORGEOUS woman, I was very confused. It didn't harm the relationship, but I'd look for signs of flight discretely, constantly.